No rewards…just consequences - Part 2

Posted on 04 Apr 2025 @ 11:26am by Ensign S'Ers-a M'Lyr'Zor & Lieutenant JG Sofie Ullswater

3,708 words; about a 19 minute read

Mission: Episode 21 - Helix
Location: Deck 4 / Personal Quarters (Sera)
Timeline: MD 05 - 1100

[ON]

Previously...

"Yes. Just so, Sofie. Study the flame..." Sera's voice cut through the lassitude that came from focusing on the candle. The woman's smaller hands were resting on her palms and the contact produced a rather captivating current up her arms to the base of her skull. Shutting her eyes momentarily, she exhaled a slow, measured breath and began speaking. "It is the light of clarity, it chases away the shadows of doubt..." Her words trickled into Vulkhansu, as the verbiage itself became irrelevant, only the physical connection between their fingertips.

And now the continuation...

Sofie found herself in a different place...an enclosed courtyard with a bubbling fountain against the high stone wall where ancient weapons of war were displayed. She found herself ensconced in a low, rather comfortable, seating area that encircled the water feature and sitting amongst pillows was Sera, resplendent in clothing that was definitely not Starfleet issue. If she was astute enough--Sofie would feel that the metaphysical walls of this courtyard were keeping things in and holding things out.

It allowed for those who were not yet competent with meditative practices to feel the peace and calm able to be achieved through ongoing practice. In Sofie's case, Sera hoped that it would give the woman some time to rest...the strange draw to please her again surged through her mind. She would do anything for Sofie...just as she would for Lamar...it was...logical, yes?'

Sofie glanced around. She was somewhere else. There wasn't any fire which made it different to all the other somewhere elses she had been recently. Sera was there, sat across from her. Sofie turned to look over her shoulder one way and then the other checking for the other Sofie, but she wasn't there. The two of them were alone.

"Where are we?" Sofie rationally felt she should be anxious having been transported to an unfamiliar place, but she was not. She was calm. "Do you create this space? What is its purpose?"

"We are in my quarters, Sofie Ullswater. This is an in-between place in my mind...It's purpose is familiar neutrality, or in your case, it is merely a tranquil place in which to be at peace. You have already noticed a lack of a certain elemental component. The seating here is quite comfortable; if you feel so inclined you may stretch out and relax. I will watch over you."

"Alright," Sofie gave an affirmative nod to the suggestion.

It had already been a long day, a long week truth be told, and the pillowed seating did look very inviting. Sofie collapsed into its embrace with a sigh. This was cosy, nicer than a starship by a long way, and with Sera close by things seemed serene. She could rest for a while, just like Sera suggested. All that she could want now was a nice mug of hot—

There was something she was forgetting, or maybe something she was just remembering. Something was tugging at the strands of her memories. Something like a warning. It was on the tip of her tongue but she just couldn't quite grasp it. Had she been here before? Had she been here recently?

She looked over to Sera and the at the sight of her guardian the momentary anxiety dissipated as quickly as it had emerged. Nothing could be wrong here, in a place this tranquil and with Sera close by. Whatever she thought she remembered was quickly washed away by the waters of the fountain, drowned in the bubbling serenity.

Sera 'watched' as Sofie fell into the low seating with a sigh. She recalled engaging in quite the similar act many times over the years; the pillows proved to be a temptation she had not been able to resist, either. Normally a guided meditation would occur using this technique, but Sofie was so weary...Sera could feel it. Rest was a logical necessity.

"Yes. Good, Sofie. Focus on the sound of the water. It is a soothing sound; it quenches thirst, cleanses, rejuvenates." Sera would have liked to have taken her own advice but found that maintaining this mental construct was more taxing than usual. The 'weight' of an outside force pressed heavily against her...for now it was tolerable. Sofie needed this...she needed this. There was much to reconcile in her mind, and as the time had presented itself, she began to work through the veritable backlog of personal experiences to maintain her own personal sense of control. For now the entity remained silent.

Though she might have liked to have asked some questions and satisfied her voracious curiosity Sofie held back. She instead focused on the water, taking in its continual pattern of splashes, following the instruction of Sera as best she could. Because you want to be a good guest? Again a hand plucked at a strand of memory that she didn't recognise but just as the first time it bounced off. Its reverberation drowned out by the pleasant sound of the water. Its warning unheeded.

It was only now, amidst the peace, that Sofie was able to feel just how exhausted she was. She had known in her rational mind that from missed sleep and skipped meals she had been running on fumes for weeks but with all the pressures of her job, the tribulations imparted by the cold station and her desire to not let any of that show, she hadn't allowed herself to feel it. Now though there was nothing to do but feel it. With distractions removed and Sera's instruction to relax it all came rushing in at once and she was suddenly so very aware of the deep pit of exhaustion at the centre of her being, sucking in most everything else.

"I'm tired." She said it aloud, less so to inform Sera but more just to put the enormity of the feeling into some quantifiable words. To take hold of it by identifying it. Hopefully that wasn't against the rules. Were there rules? Sera hadn't mentioned any rules.

"I know, Sofie. I felt it the moment we touched in the arboretum...it was why I suggested this." She gracefully pushed herself forward, forgoing the seiza-like position to move forward until she was next to the chief science officer's supine form. Placing her hand mere inches from Sofie's, Sera looked down into Sofie's inquisitive grey eyes. "I am experiencing a curious compulsion to assist you however I can. That you have trusted me enough to come here and allow my touch after...I am gratified" Sera replied in a dreamy manner. "I also feel your curiosity. You may ask your questions at anytime, Sofie."

She didn't need any more prompting "Is this a replica of a real place or is it something completely ephemeral? I can feel it's taking you some concentration to retain its form, is that normal or is it because I am here? The flow of water couldn't be a true simulation of fluid dynamics so it has to be a simulation of the perception of water, right? That's to say you aren't conjuring a facsimile of a psychical space but projecting an impression of a physical space into my imagination. Or into a shared imagination?" Sofie tried to keep her mind from racing too quickly but she did have so so many questions, they all spilled out at once. Enough that she was able to completely ignore the feeling of impending doom that momentarily surfaced as Sera got closer to her.

She pointed at the weapons mounted on the wall and continued to question with a bubbling joyful energy of curiosity propelling her onward "Are those decorative or are you interested in the martial arts? How often do you spend time here? Are you going to hurt me? Are there other locations that you use for meditation? Do they all stem from here?" So enrapt was she with curiosity she didn't even notice the odd one out, it just bounced off her consciousness like so much else had. She shook her head and sighed once again, happier, smiling. "Sorry Sera, too many questions. I don't know what's come over me."

Sera's eyes softened in bemusement. Questions it was, then. "It is mental construct of a real place; an inner courtyard that was a...preferred space for me growing up. The concentration required is greater than usual, but not significantly so. I suppose it is a simulation of how I perceive water - it does help that I understand fluid dynamics...it took...years to get it to an acceptable point. And yes, it is more of a physical impression."

The first set of questions were answered; and no doubt more inquiries were born of her quick responses. Sera continued. "The weapons are weapons; decorative in a sense but they are still honed to a razor sharp edge. I have engaged in considerable training in unarmed and armed forms of combat, and this is my preferred starting point in guided meditations...

Her next question elicited an arched brow. "Hurt you? Why would I hurt you? I only wish to see to your safety and comfort. There are other constructs I hold within my consciousness but I thought that this one would feel...secure. The walls of this courtyard are carved from the cliff walls of the Vuldi Gorge."

"You need not apologize, Sofie. Questions flow far easier without the added complexity of speech. Your curiosity is an alluring trait." She reached out with her opposite hand and gently traced the rounded line of her cheek with the backs of her fingers. Although a mental construct, Sera could 'perceive' the warmth of her soft skin and the energy that was unique to Sofie...it was somewhat intoxicating.

The sensation of touch had enough pull on Sofie's lost memories to briefly slide into her consciousness as a feeling of déjà vu, easily rationalised away but at least noticed this time. "Incurious people are uninteresting. Uninteresting people are not worth my time." Sofie agreed, or at least she thought she was agreeing. The intensity of her opinion might not quite match what Sera was going for. She closed her eyes, content with just the sounds of the place and its other resident for the time being. "It will be sad to leave here. It's so difficult to find peace on this ship. The only place out there I can relax is the Arboretum with all our small friends."

Sera tilted her head slightly in consideration. It was a curious statement and seemed rather incongruent with Sofie's other responses. It would be something she would take note of for further consideration but put it aside for now. "The Arboretum is most adequate," She readily agreed, "And I am gratified that you find peace here...I do too. I spent many hours in the same position you are in now. It was quite agreeable."

"Thank you for sharing it with me." The pillows were more comfortable than anything she could think of, the sound of the water as tranquil as can be. And having Sera right here next to her, keeping her safe, was the best reassurance she could imagine. "I'm very grateful. I know somewhere like this must be private and we don't know each other all that well but it means a lot that you felt able to share it and it means a lot to have you here next to me."

Privacy is unnecessary between mates, yes? Sera's brows furrowed and she looked beyond Sofie as the unasked for interjection echoed in her mind. We are not mates. She answered silently. Oh? You've brought her to your favorite place...you're watching over her...you desire her, desire to please her. Besides, it would serve Lamar right, yes? He loves her...you remember the shuttle...

Vulcans do not collect mates. Sera projected emphatically towards the unwanted interloper in her mind, and she unconsciously grit her teeth against the unbidden thoughts. It was logical to assist. Sofie was the chief science officer and performed a vital function on this ship. "I come to serve, Sofie. I am gratified that I can assist you."

Sofie opened her eyes and quickly scrambled to be sitting up straight. Sera's emphatic refutation had rung through her head like a bell. "You're thoughts are very loud. Why do you want to collect me?" Looking into the taller woman's eyes Sofie saw her so graceful and caring but also somehow vulnerable, any initial panic melted away. Without much thinking about it she reached out and touched Sera's hand with her own. Neither a renewed feeling of déjà vu nor all the rationality in the world could stop the next words from just falling out of her mouth "I'm already yours."

Loud thoughts? She had discerned that? That was concerning. Sera inhaled a ragged breath, and recognized just how far they had deviated from the purpose of this exercise...this exchange was beginning to demonstrate similar qualities to the intimate sharing that occurred through a katelau-tels...and then with what Sofie said next?

"...Gods," Sera whispered softly...and skittering laughter echoed through her mind. Parted from me but never parted, always touching and touched... It was said in her own voice, but it held a shrillness that made her extremities involuntarily tremble. It was a mocking sound.

"Sofie, I beg your forgiveness for--" But her words were cut off as the exotically beautiful human woman assertively reached out and touched her hand with a light caress of fingertips. Sera's eyes languidly closed, and she made a soft, almost-purr sound as all coherent thoughts scattered like grains of sand in a gust of wind.

Sofie...adun'a?...t'hy'la?... "Tell me what you want, Sofie...I'll do anything that you want."

Hearing those words brought Sofie so much joy. She closed her eyes again and smiled greedily. She belonged to Sera and Sera belonged to her: Lamar would never get between them again. She wrapped her hand around Sera's, holding it in her own. They were safe and happy and, most importantly, together.

"I... I, um..." Sofie stammered, trying to answer her beloved's question but her brain couldn't find its way around any things she actually wanted Sera to do. She wanted to them to be together, forever joined and belonging, but she had no specifics in her head, no shape that her thoughts could gain purchase on. It all felt foggy and non-specific. "I don't know what I want, adun'a."

As the confusion grew Sofie began to notice an odd taste in her mouth, it reminded her of a mortuary or a hospice. She couldn't identify it, just like she couldn't identify what she wanted. She held on tighter to Sera's hand. Anxiety was creeping in at the edges of her consciousness. Something was definitely wrong. She looked into her beloved's eyes, hoping for some reassurance.

"You...You want to be bound to me?" Sera responded in a sense of wonder. The entity's words from earlier--with Lamar--echoed in her mind...

You can't escape...I'm inside of you. I am you. Just like the ones you call 'Lamar' and 'Sofie'. I am...growing. Reproducing. It is a pleasant experience.

Yes. Sofie would desire this. Just as Lamar called for the human female during their most recent sexual encounter. They were one, and now that Ket'Cheleb was inside of her, too...growing? Sera did not wish to consider this line of reasoning any further. It was far more satisfying to focus on her thy'la.

However, she perceived...Anxiety...feeling of wrongness? No. This was not acceptable. This was in exact opposition of the purpose of this exercise. Sera returned Sofie's firm grip and pulled the woman towards her, rejoicing as she was finally in her arms. Her fingertips began to quest along the rounded lines of her face, so very different from the her own. Sofie was so aesthetically pleasing to her...the neural nodes along her cheekbone were found with no difficulty at all.

Although connected to the science officer through her actions with Lamar; it was only logical to share with Sofie in the same manner. To commune directly...

Yes, yes, yes! Ket'Cheleb crooned in her mind having found a way through her defenses to seat itself fully within her consciousness in this rather fascinating telepathic exchange. It was quite pleased to have brought this creature into itself. It had such interesting skills that were already being put too 'good' use.

The ritual words were unnecessary. They were already joined...the scene began to change - the bubbling of the fountain melted a way to the crackle of flames from the torches lit upon the stone walls. The low seating had transformed into a rounded sleeping platform, swathed with diaphanous fabrics that caused the flickering light from the fires to paint warm light upon their skin.

Sera's form shuddered as their connection deepened...this was beyond her experience or understanding. She suddenly wondered if Lamar would be affected in the same manner Sofie was when they had engaged with one another.

It would serve him right. Let him suffer...

"You are mine, Sofie Ullswater. I will care for you to the best of my ability, adun'a, and will endeavor to be that which you require..."

As the scene of their shared reality changed the cloying oppressive calmness that the courtyard had been smothering Sofie with began to dissolve. The anxiety that had been creeping in was turning to fear, as wine turns to vinegar: a slow fermentation pushed ever onward by millions of tiny wrongnesses. Her eyes darted around the new scene with a panicked energy but the only thing that seemed solid, the only thing that she could understand was the woman in front of her: Sera, who she could trust above all others. Sera, who she loved. "Where are we, Sera? What's going on?"

Her questioning, vulnerable tone saved her. It jarred Sera from the incongruous desires for this female flowing through her consciousness. Incongruous, why? Here you can be anyone, anything, in any place? You want Sofie? Take her. Take her as your Vulcan instincts tell you to...take her as a man would take a woman, even...she'll still love you; she can't help herself.

Ket'Cheleb's voice was like a bucket of cold water doused over her, chilling her to the core. She forced herself--and how she had to force herself--to release the hold she had on Sofie's limbs and face, and slowly moved herself away from the fearful woman. That she may have been the source of her discomfort filled Sera with distress.

It seemed prudent to wrap her arms around her legs as she drew her knees to her chest. There. Sofie was safe, now. Her eyes looked about the space and she sighed softly, recognizing the place. "This is an approximation of my sleeping chamber...only Lamar..." Sera's words halted. She had not wanted to bring him up here, to her. It did not feel right. This was supposed to help Sofie feel calm and safe; to allow her the rest that she desperately needed, not to stress her further.

"My thoughts are...were...straying from the purpose of this. I fear I shall have to continue apologizing given these ongoing lapses in control. I only seem to make things worse."

That death like taste that had been lingering in Sofie's mouth was suddenly given shape at the invocation of Lamar's name. Saurian brandy was one of Lamar's favorite drinks, he had told her that, talked about how it brought back memories of the war and his old comrades. She had always hated the taste, she had told him that. It wasn't something they would have shared as friends.

The impression of an unremembered event that had been tugging at Sofie's mind since they had entered the realm of the meditation now started to form into something solid. She remembered the numbness, the brandy, the taste of death, Lamar as cold as a corpse, the world turning to ice and drowning in a sea of shimmering tar. As the memory started to crystalise so too did the fear that accompanied it, a fear of Lamar and the creature that had been inside him... The same creature that now inhabited Sera.

"What did you mean when you said he was with me in the shuttle bay? I wasn't there was I? Why would he have called me anything?" Sofie's words were slow and measured, they tried very hard to sound calm but in showing that effort it was obvious she was anything but calm. She was trying to understand what had happened but from the fragmented memories nothing seemed to make sense but the fear. "Something happened and I don't remember it."

She looked at Sera, the Vulcan had all bundled up. Was it guilt? Though Sera's retreat had removed an immediate danger Sofie couldn't help herself, she loved Sera and she needed her: She extended a hand in Sera's direction "Would you hold my hand? I'm scared."

"I know you are scared. Your emotions are very loud." Her brow flicked in a gesture that would denote a sense of momentary levity as she was able to turn Sofie's prior words back at her. Sera dipped her head slightly...in resignation? In defeat? It did not matter. How could she deny her comfort when at her most vulnerable?

Sera slowly, carefully extended her hand towards Sofie. "I saw glimpses into his thoughts...he was focused upon you. Pale skin with a pink undertone, not green. A figure filled with graceful curves, not straight lines. Cheerful features, not an expression empty of emotion...he was rapturous. He whispered your name; it felt quite significant to him."

To be continued...


[OFF]

=====


Ensign S'Ers-A M'Lyr'Zor
Chief Engineering Officer
USS Galileo-A

&

Lieutenant JG Sofie Ullswater
Chief Science Officer
USS Galileo-A

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