Mens Exculta

Posted on 01 Jan 2013 @ 4:40pm by Lieutenant Kiri Cho

6,677 words; about a 33 minute read

Mission: Episode 02 - Resupply
Location: USS Galileo: Multipurpose Laboratory
Timeline: MD15 1230 Hours

ON:

Liyar transferred the remaining information off of his PADD and loaded up the terminal on the other console in the empty laboratory. The test packets had come in from the VSA for Cho, expedient as usual. He very logically, very calmly, chose to decline their offer of renewing his own evaluation. He knew himself, his own mind, his abilities. They hadn't seen fit to revoke his certification to administer the test, so they obviously could not have thought it reasonable to do so. His clothing had the slightly rumpled look, and the laboratory looked pretty well-lived in, further evidence that he'd spent a lot of time there.

As always, by himself, his environments tended to grow and include various scribblings and computer programs and analyses and maps and economic calculations and walls and walls of equations. A half-drank mug of tea sat on the desk behind him.

He had called Cho up to the lab via the comm system some time ago, and was assured that she would be up within the hour. For now he was standing over one of the projected boards, using the tip of his fingers to draw out the complex patterns in Vulcan characters. He would pause, then whirl about and write another random string of code, check the PADDs on his desk, in his hand, piling off of the floor. The result was messy and haphazard, and to any casual reader in Vulcan would look like graphs of supply/demand, innovation/stagnation, balances, reserves, interplanetary relationships and balances, governmental hierarchies resembling family trees and other random things that were mostly obsolete to Starfleet but somehow found their way into his brain.

Lexorin, this aforementioned brain rumbled at him, and he started to himself, eyes zoned out. Medication! the Inner Voice yelled louder, refusing to be daunted by its owner. When he got into one of his obsessive modes he usually forgot to eat and drink, and especially forgot inconsequential things like medication. He paused and grabbed the cartridge on his desk, injecting it into his neck and replacing it just in time to spot Kiri at the door. In a short sleeved tunic and rumpled pants, amidst a variety of what seemed like complete nonsense, he looked almost human. He stared at her for a moment, before suddenly coming back to himself and picking up his tea, normally.

"Computer, clear." The calculations disappeared. He pilfered his several dozen PADDs up from his surroundings and deposited them on the desk, drawing the bright purple uniform jacket back on to hide the tattoo on his arm. He was, after all, on duty. "Lieutenant," he greeted. "My apologies. I did not notice your presence. The test evaluation packet has come in, as I indicated. I have prepared the terminal over here to begin." He gestured to the terminal and chair over on the opposite (unused) side of the lab.

"Sorry I'm late," Kiri bowed her head as she moved towards the chair, "The Commander requested my presence." She was somewhat surprised that he had tattoos did Vulcan's normally have body art? Settling into the seat Kiri adjusted her own uniform slightly and looked rather apprehensive, what she was actually going to be doing here was a mystery. The details and what would actually be in this test had not been forthcoming.

Liyar walked over behind her, and pulled out one of his PADDS as if it had a honing beacon on it, very familiar with them all and their contents, and held it out to Kiri. "This is a medical waiver," he explained, placing it on the desk beside her. "As the test involves significant mental contact, it will clear you for psionic interaction, as indicated by the Shi'kahr Convention." He sat down across from her and began keying up the initial stages. "I am obligated to inform you that some psi-null individuals experience side effects, such as nausea, headaches, dizziness or fatigue after psionic contact, but these symptoms are easily managed with anti-emetic medication. Signal your consent by placing your thumb in the area shown below. If you do not consent, the test will go no further."

He didn't say anything about risks before. Reading through she made sure it was clear before going any further, checking what she was signing. It wasn't going to kill her that was fine but one thing wasn't clear, what did he mean by contact? Rather worriedly she asked, "Are you going to read my mind?"

"In a fashion," Liyar answered, furrowing his eyebrow. He had thought that was obvious. "I will not be seeking thoughts or memories. Though, they may be part of the equation, in terms of how you see the universe. I will be attempting to discern your neural patterns, your..." He realized he didn't have a Standard word for it, and mutely gestured. "Sense of being," he translated as best as he could. "As I mentioned, many find the prospect uncomfortable. I assure you, I will not violate your privacy."

"Okay," Kiri felt somewhat reassured by that. Pressing her thumb onto the pad she learned closer to the desk as she passed it back over. "I'm ready to start."

"Very well. The first section of the test is utilizing this terminal." The terminal in front of her lit up, as did the opposite-facing one in front of him. Several symbols and images were present, lined up in rows. "Your task is to go through each row and pick out the correct picture. You will rely on me to give you the information you need to make the choice, though I will not verbalize anything. You will attempt to pick the image that I am thinking of. This is a test in overt receptive telepathy. You may place your hand on my wrist if you believe physical contact will assist you with this." He placed his right arm over by Kiri's monitor.

Okay, so it was like one of those parlour games. While she was hesitant about contact after some thought it was clear that it couldn't harm her chances. Two cold fingers rested on his exposed skin, something she seemed mildly uncomfortable and her eyes settled onto the images in front of her. What she was expecting she didn't know but she didn't feel anything different. So reluctantly it was almost at random that she was picking shapes and image from the choices in front of her. Maybe she wasn't going to find anything useful after all.

Liyar gave nothing away in his posture in terms of how he felt or what he thought. After Kiri had gone through each item, a new set of tasks popped up. While she worked, Liyar made notations on his own terminal in turn, though she would not be able to see until it was over. After inputting the calculations, ratios of right versus wrong, he easily determined she was making guesses, relying on body language, as most receptive-nulls were prone to. This didn't necessarily indicate psi-null, though. Niurek had scored abysmally in this section, and he was one of the strongest telepaths Liyar had ever met.

The next stages of the test involved variations on the theme. Picking out numbers, letters, phrases, and then evolving into emotions, feelings and empathy. Liyar lowered his own emotional shields at this, continuing to maintain calm while he continued to enter information into his terminal. So far, her ability for receptive telepathy was proving low. After about a half an hour, this part of the test was concluded, with several more tasks under her belt, he switched the terminals simultaneously to produce the second half.

It resembled the first half, with similar images and patterns. "This part of your evaluation is much the same," Liyar said. "Except, I will be attempting the reverse. It is your task to communicate to me the pattern you wish to choose. While I am capable of picking up your thoughts, I will only be able to choose the image which you project at me." He shut down several receptive walls in his mind to make it easier to discern for him. He kept his hand by the terminal. "If you feel physical contact may assist you, once again, you are free to do so."

Kiri did so, placing her fingers on his arm again. Again she didn't really know what she was doing. Thinking the pictures as loud as she could in her head, Kiri really did try. If it worked or not she didn't know. Triangle, square, moon, sunset, fifty seven, heart.

Liyar worked on his own terminal. He input the items she'd picked as they showed up different sets, for his own testing data rather than as actual answers, adding an extra notation that he suspected she had an ability to mentally shield herself. This would likely show up more fully when he ran the shielding tests, but reading her was about the same as reading through any telepath's instinctive inner shields.

He added an extra notation to confer further with Lieutenant Mialin, the joined Betazoid flight chief. Trill telepaths usually had the ability to communicate with Trill symbionts, as he'd discovered during the Trill packet he'd picked up from Starfleet Command. The next phase of the test he brought up was specifically geared toward Trill neurology, repeating similar tasks to earlier and then comparing results, inputting some calculations into the computer for record keeping but doing most of it mentally. He was done with that phase of the testing about another half-hour later.

After this, a blank page and typepad came up. "With as much ability as you are able," he instructed, "Write about the environment around you." He gestured to the multi-purpose lab. "The laboratory, the ship, the crew, even myself. What you can see, feel, hear with your senses and any other observations you may have, including postulation." This was the part that tended to take people a long time, and he looked in no hurry. "Be as honest as you are able, and take as long as necessary."

Without pause Kiri started, her fingers moving very quickly.I am in a room with Lieutenant Junior Grade Liyar of the Starfleet Diplomatic Corps. The room is approximately five meters by seven meters in a standard Starfleet design in grey. The ceiling is two and a half meters high and has no decoration. A desk with two terminals is between Lieutenant Liyar and myself. Other than lab equipment the room is empty.

The ship is currently on the surface of Vega IX in the Vega system, 90 light years of the Sol system. The sun is at its apex and the sky is clear on the planets surface at approximately fourteen degrees local. The ship has minor damage to secondary systems that are still under repair. Members of the engineering department are still working on correcting those systems currently. Science personnel on duty are preparing the department for operation and bringing aboard new equipment. Those that are not on duty are still free to leave the ship for the next few hours. That was most of what she knew without going into too much detail, now for guesses? Well they felt like guesses, Captain Saalm is on the bridge, Commander Holliday is in his office, Lieutenant Stone is in his office, Lieutenant Panne is in the messhall. Her hands were moving without thinking about it, she was focused more on writing than what she was thinking, Lieutenant Nephthys zhian'tara Vistra II conference, Lieutenant Rhodes is in the messhall. Several more guesses went onto the screen until Kiri felt she couldn't come up with anything else.

Liyar transferred the data being input on his own screen into the appropriate files. Like with all testing subjects, after she'd paused, a common hesitance as he'd come to discover, he'd interjected to prompt her to continue as best as she could, using the rest of her senses. As a Vulcan, it was probably bizarre to be encouraged to share emotional impressions and empathetic data, but as a telepath, it could be understandable. This was the most important part of the test, so he guided her toward a well rounded text until he was satisfied she'd understood the parameters fully. All in all this took more time than the others, about an hour and a half. Once this was done, he stood and rolled the stool over to her side of the table. "This part of the evaluation involves mind-to-mind contact. Have you experienced this before?" he asked, sitting again in front of her, looking down at her placidly.

Kiri was starting to feel rather worn out now, "No, nothing like that," She squirmed a little. Even for her sitting still on a task like this without a break to move around meant she got fidgety. This was really the part that worried her the most, despite what he said that he won't really be reading her mind. There were very private things in there she didn't want to share with anyone, the idea of having someone else poking around was an invasion.

"Very well. The simplest way to do this is for me to establish a one-way link between our minds. You will not have access to my mind, but you will be able to sense and feel my presence within yours," he explained. "I understand that there are areas of your life which are personal, and I will attempt to respect your privacy as much as possible." As a Vulcan, that was his own personal preference. "It is likely I will perceive some understanding of your experiences, due to the fact that telepathy is very strongly correlated with the summation of your existence. If there are any specific memories you do not wish me to see, I will be aware of this and avoid them. But as I mentioned, I will not be actively seeking these experiences." Liyar suddenly blinked. The minute movement and uncomfortable squirming made him realize that she wasn't capable of going hours without movement or food the same way he was. "If you wish to procure something to eat before we begin, or take a general break, you may." He gestured to the replicator unit near the side of the lab.

"Can I stand up for a minute or two?" Food or water wasn't what she wanted, just a chance to stretch her muscles for a little bit. As long as he wasn't going to try and breaking into her private things it would all be fine.

"Affirmative," Liyar agreed, and absently picked up the tea he'd abandoned a while ago, standing up himself to go and deposit it in the reclamator. He got himself another one, and leaned against the opposite wall, perusing a PADD with the remainder of his earlier ramblings on it in no real hurry.

Kiri stood, she wondered around the room and she even stretched out her arms when she didn't think he would look up. This all in all wasn't really that hard but it didn't seem like she was actually able to do anything at all. Else at least something would have happened right? Once standing became boring which only took a minute she sat back down and in a quite voice spoke up, "I'm ready," Not wanting to interrupt what he was now doing.

The Vulcan put down the PADD, but kept his tea. He came over to sit down again and rolled up his sleeves a bit to avoid anything getting in his way. That Kiri was Trill and not Vulcan was one of the reasons he paused before beginning, ensuring his own center was steady with the calm he'd been maintaining for much of the day. Once he was settled, he rose his right hand, the long winding lines of the tattoo visible closer to her as being Vulcan calligraphy and something that looked like hieroglyphs, complex patterns resembling something like an old-style tribal marking. He pressed the tip of his thumb against her orbital bone, maneuvering his hand into the proper position. He didn't intone any words other than, "We will begin -"

Now.

It wasn't jerky or uncomfortable at all, much the opposite, his voice filled her head, and then he began drawing them closer together, until he seemed to 'pass over' through them, into her. Using his own abilities, he created a structure inside her mind that she could recognize. A hallway with doors, a room with a fountain in it, several random glowing stones guarding it. This wasn't her real mindspace, but it was something she could see, and interact with. It was concrete, and simple. He brought them both all the way down into it, until she felt like she was there too, in body, able to move and interact at will, with him standing beside her. Instead of speaking words, they came from within and without, understood rather easily. He gestured to the stones. Show me this, he requested. His mind voice was warm, which was at contrast to his regular voice, and oddly sincere sounding.

More than anything it felt like a sinking feeling in her gut. Sharing her mind with someone was something new and she was feeling rather powerless about it. Heavy and slow she reached for the stone like a blur that lunged to and fro. It didn't have a weight to it, as she lifted it up and looked at it herself before handing it over. Odd for her while like this she couldn't actually feel anything with her fingers, turning to Liyar she held it up to him. As she did so the corner of the hall behind her started to crumble slightly. Behind it shapes moved in a dusty darkness, right on the edge of sight.

Liyar took it carefully, and brushed his hand over it like he was handling something delicate. He closed his eyes and offered a small pulse of something toward it, as if bringing it into her conscious awareness. He projected equal measures of calm and acceptance to combat her more powerless feelings, as if taking everything in a sieve and letting it fall out of him, without judgment. For now, he ignored the shapes and shadows, setting them apart while he focused on the heavy sheet of purple-blue stone in his hands. Do you recognize this? he asked wordlessly, blinking curiously at her.

She sort of did know it. It was vague, like a distant memory. Struggling with a furrowed brow she answered very softly, My mother's cooking. Her mind's eyes were on him rather than behind her still. The small holes were growing, cracks running from them. Nothing came through though, nothing yet.

I believe these are Inner Shields, Liyar explained, brushing it off as if wiping dust off of an old book, letting her see. They are present within every telepath. Have you noted this presence before?

No. When I think someone is trying to read my mind though, I think of numbers to try and stop them. What does it mean? Inch by inch the cracks grew and the walls started to give way under them.

The presence of these shields at the strength they currently possess indicates that you are a telepath of some degree, Liyar replied contemplatively. He then stood back and replaced the stone. He held out both of his hands at his sides and brought them slowly together. Once they touched, he brought them even deeper, though this was less able to visualize itself. Instead, they were like entities, passing through Kiri's life, her thoughts, feelings, and down through to almost her very essence, the neurons and atoms that made up who she was, that occupied her space in time. While Liyar could discern some of her experiences and feelings, he kept true to his word and remained focused on his task, eventually touching on the very part of Kiri inside that simply made her Kiri. It was a strange glowing thing, and Liyar was following various threads, determining the influence of psionics in her life and their strength. Here, time stopped having any real meaning.

When she cried it would normally become warm. This time it didn't she was cold, she cried and she cried until she couldn't any more. Sleep came before warmth did, there was a bald face that she couldn't remember. She was never cold like that again after that.

"You should never cry in public Kiri," A stern wrinkled face looked down at her, "All this noise and fuss over a scrape. If you don't want them then don't run around all over the place and behave yourself."

One Sunday morning the warm sun came up and -pop!- out of the egg came a very hungry caterpillar.

"Don't show your emotions all the time, someone sees you grinning all the time they'll think you are stupid. Just a small smile, see?"

"Spotty crybaby, spot, spot, spot," This string was rankled with pain, "Million spots," Running away and hiding, repeated time and again.

"I don't know what to do. Were we wrong? Should we have said no and sent her to Trill? Crying like that, does she hate it here?"

I don't want to be sent away, I can't be bad. I can't even think of bad things, I have to be good. I don't want to make mummy cry. I'm not allowed to cry any more.

Kiri's outer mind that was brought to this level wanted to leave. There was no motion she couldn't get her head around this existence, she wanted to pull at Liyar and make him stop but didn't know how. She knew all this was here, sometimes it surfaced and she had to face it again. It was all here though, this was where she hid things and he was inside her looking at it. Her mind thrashed and fought with her but so far to no avail.

Liyar immediately worked to follow along, letting himself be buoyed by her obvious distress, pulling himself away from the experiences as much as possible. He used his own exo-shields to help with that, and much of it bounced off of him without him even being aware of it, while others were more relevant, such as the numbers and shielding, which he filed away and kept going. Mostly he was looking at neural patterns, extending a less than physical part of himself, simply air that touched and took with it particles and molecules along, without allowing himself too much free reign in her head. He pulled himself way, way back at her frantic feelings thrashing about in his head, and waited until it was calmer and she had signaled assent again.

"Spot, spot, spot." Tears again, running again.

I won't go near them any more, I'll play in my room.

"Well done Kiri, this is really good," A warm embrace, "You are doing so well,"

I'm not lonely, I have my mummy.

A knight in shining armour, he would protect me from mean people. I'm fine though, I just need to work hard.

I'm not lonely, I can't let anyone know how I feel. They would send me away, if I think about it I'll cry. I'm not allowed to cry.

"Good morning Kiri," Older now stronger maybe

"Good morning Trisha," I can't let her read my mind, 0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, 34, 55, 89, 144, 233, 377, 610, 987, 1597, 2584, 4181, 6765, 10946, 17711, 28657, 46368, 75025, 121393, 196418, 317811, 514229, 832040. If she knows she'll ask me, I can't let her.

"I can never get a clue on you Kiri," A clatter of jewellery on her wrists, "Its just numbers and junk with you."

I'm not lonely, I can't let people know.

Kiri was already afraid she was already fighting but part of her knew what would home up next. That horrible dream that was chasing her from the last weeks, it was a blackness inside somewhere. She was fleshly burying it and he would dig it up if he kept going. She had to stop him, screaming inside her own head now she thought she got his attention. Before anything else happened though she lurched upwards, further and further away.

Once again with her sudden lurch, Liyar knew to back off once more. Abruptly, however, they were pulled back into the otherworld area and Liyar could feel the strange rain falling on him and the odd imagery, but nothing in him suggested fear or disgust. Instead he met it calmly, defensively.

A white stone tower that was growing faster and faster and pushing her upwards and away from Liyar. In the distance she could see the red rain starting to fall in every direction and willed it faster. Below at the foot of the tower an armoured knight carrying a sword matched forwards, swirling fractal patterns in mist followed him clouding everything. Red rain started to fall in every direction, a baby's cries filled the air and the knight walked closer to Liyar. Steel flashed with a long sword that sliced mist and air and Liyar.

He turned in time to catch the sword aimed at him, through his mind, and instantly clapped his hands upward, throwing out a massive burst of gold, throwing every thread back in their own rightful place, like books being recalled to their shelves. Disappearing the knight, rending it harmless, the sword itself didn't penetrate his shielding beforehand. He and Kiri emerged faster and faster, the shadows began to form the rooms once again, the fountain and stones, which then extended out from threads, and finally -

Kiri fell back onto the floor, scrabbling at first as panic startled to settle. Her breathing was heavy and her eyes wide, what happened?

"Lieutenant," Liyar started, moving quickly to help her to her feet. He pulled her to her feet carefully, her weight as negligible to him as the PADDs he'd carried moments before, and helped her onto the chair. As if he'd somehow appeared it in his hand, he set a glass of juice in front of her. "Drink. It is important to replenish your glucose levels. You experienced some distress in the meld. A fairly common occurrence for P3s and higher upon their first experiences." The packet that he'd given her to sign did state this, though P3 was high for a Trill, most Trills only experienced the ability to directly communicate with symbionts. Her initial lack of progress lulled her into a sense of false security, no doubt. It was for this reason an instructor was necessary. "I believe you were attempting to shield me from personal memories. I have obtained the information I require, and I do not believe I have compromised your privacy. I utilized my own outer shields to prevent much of it from bleeding through. How are you feeling?" he asked, shining a penlight in her eyes and checking pupil dilation and taking her pulse manually. Her readings were good, and he was simultaneously typing all at once in the terminal in front of him. The test would take a few hours to fully compute, though he'd inadvertently revealed the score he'd already calculated. And, it was no doubt the accurate one.

"Okay," She squinted at the light and felt him manhandle her. Drinking some of the juice she tried to focus her mind, she needed to cool down. She felt like she wanted to cry and part of her wanted to hit Liyar as hard as she could. Tense she asked, "Should I do anything?" Or was she meant to just wait for the results?

"The test will take some time to analyze fully your results. You are angry with me," Liyar observed, turning away from the terminal to focus on her.

"Yes," Lying to someone that had just been inside her mind seemed rather futile. Part of her was angry with him but she wouldn't act on it. Taking another drink she tried to distract herself with thinking. Was it her, 'shield' affecting how she felt?

"I regret that I have caused you pain." It was his own opinion that it was this, not truly anything he'd actively done, that was causing the reaction. It wasn't actually that uncommon, there was a reason most people only went through testing once unless there was some kind of severe psychic or neurological trauma. Even Vulcans would transpose this anger at being exposed onto their instructor. "Would you care to discuss why?" he asked, either undaunted or putting aside his own feelings about it.

"I don't know," Kiri didn't think that she did. She had tried before and she had cried, she had felt a great wall tumble down inside her. She was willing and wanted to share that then but he had left right after gaining her trust. Liyar wasn't likely to make fun of her or share her secrets but still, he was someone different. Even if she did share things with him, would he be able to help her in any useful way? Finishing her water she finally answered succinctly, "Those memories are something I'm ashamed of now."

"I had surmised as much. Your anger is a logical, and very common reaction. The psi-test is very rigorous and demanding psychologically. The reason I broke the meld was due to the fact that your inherent shielding lashed out at my mind as an intrusion," he explained, "Not due to rejection. Generally when such a thing occurs it is imperative to end mental connections for safety reasons. However," he added, "I do not believe there is cause for shame in what I did see. Is this something you are willing to discuss with me?" he asked, turning off the monitor pointedly, indicating it wasn't a 'test-question'.

"They are things that I did as a child that were wrong and harmed me," She shook her head, "There isn't much more to say." She hoped that would be that, no more reflecting on her past.

"My assessment would differ," he said after a long moment, shaking his head unconsciously. He really hadn't seen much, as he'd promised, but what he did see didn't exactly gel with her description. "It is imperative for all children to learn ways to safely express their feelings, especially to their caregivers. What I saw did not indicate you were given that opportunity." He inhaled calmly, looking to check on the progress of the test results for a moment. He did not expect much of a positive reception. "It is not necessary for you to discuss this, if you do not wish to," he offered her a way out, as she was looking rather uncomfortable.

"My parents did nothing wrong, they love me," Kiri glowered at him, she felt so angry. Her fingers trembled and a sick feeling welled up inside her. She loved her parents more than anything, her lovely mother with all her smiles and nice words. Her quiet father who was strong and smart, they never meant to hurt her they never did anything like that. This was all her fault, she crept out of bed, she couldn't stop crying, she was the one scared, no one else.

"I do not doubt this," Liyar assured. In truth, he had no ability to doubt it, since he did not understand love. He didn't even know if the person he'd seen was her parent or not, but he didn't pursue it anymore. "I wish to show you something. If you will permit me." The other area of the lab was empty, and covered in carpet, in what looked like an observation area. Liyar passed through the gate and held it open for Kiri. He then simply sat on the floor and placed his hands on his lap, gesturing with one upturned palm to the space beside him. "Please sit."

Kiri bit her lip and followed him, taking a seat opposite him. Trying to centre herself the normal way, it wasn't working all that well. She didn't want to do anything but she still had the urge to. He had looked at her secrets and insulted her parents, no one did that.

Once she did so, he spoke again. "You are breathing from your lungs. Do you feel it?" He noted she was breathing shallowly in anger, and placed a hand on the side of his chest, where his own lungs were. "This is causing you to breathe in short, shallow bursts. It is getting less oxygen to your brain. I would like you to focus on taking a deep breath, all the way through to your stomach." He moved his hand to his solar plexus in a fist. "It will help to lower your heart rate. Can you do this?"

More confused at what he was doing than anything Kiri did so, placing a fist against her chest. The action was very unnatural to her, it ran towards the more aggressive side of her current emotions than calming her. "Okay," Her voice was shaky and her eyes still rather cold in their appearance.

He began guiding her through a low level series of meditations, normally used to calm down after intensive emotional experience, and not uncommon for recipients of the psi-test. Rather than focus on negative experiences and emotions, to induce a more physical state of relaxation, not getting into any contemplative meditation, but purely focusing on calming. Only the steady beeping of the terminal calculating and his periodic instructions broke the silence.

As time went on, he instructed her on the first stage of meditation, and they both were now sitting in position with feet tucked under them. It was slow work, gradual in progress as there was a lot of unusual anger on Kiri's end, but Liyar remained patient and eventually they reached a somewhat successful rendition of the second stage, with much less tension in the air. It was only then that the terminal alarm beeped, signifying the test calculations were complete. Liyar did not look in much of a hurry to check them, and opened his eyes slowly. "How do you feel now?" he asked, speaking for the first time in the past hour, taking in her state with a tilted head.

Glum might well have been the answer if she was feeling truthful, "Better," She answered with a deep breath. She was still uncomfortable with what he knew about her but she didn't want to strike out at him any more. Strong emotions were gone and she just felt rather flat and sullen. The last hour had been one of the most boring of her life and felt massively unproductive.

Liyar nodded, and stood. "The results of your testing have finished calculating," he said, and crossed over the room to the nearest console, leaning over to input several keystrokes and reading the results to himself. He copied the information onto a PADD and held it out for Kiri. "The full analysis is contained within. The abridged version is that you are a level P3 projective telepath. I also believe that you may possess the ability to communicate with Trill symbionts, though this would require additional testing with the presence of one," he explained the results in the most succinct way he knew how.

Kiri's breath caught in her throat. How did he know all these things about her from just the test? What did it mean? Being able to communicate with symbionts was something some Trill could do right, the um, trainers? The ones that looked after the unjoined symbionts. But P3 projective telepath, what did that mean? Standing up she stumbled as both her legs had gone to sleep, "What does that mean, really?"

"It means that with practice, you could do much of the same thing as a Guardian on Trill, handling the care of symbionts prior to their joining a host. P3 is simply a level term," Liyar explained. "It is how strong you are, and affects how strong you can become. At your level, it is possible for you to be trained further in psionics. Projective telepathy is that which extends out from you. For example, shielding, and the ability to lash out at intruders."

She was starting to understand a little not but it wasn't something she really knew anything about. It would require some reading on the subject surely. The idea of more training though, would it be an experience like this one? Gingerly she took her seat again, "What would be involved in more training?"

Liyar wasn't sure how to best explain it. "An understanding of one's self - one's motivations and experiences - is integral to learning how to properly wield psionic ability." He folded his fingers in front of him contemplatively. "To undergo preliminary training will undoubtedly require you to examine parts of yourself that you may find painful, or difficult to look at. Any potential instructor would have some access to your mind, and you would need to trust them enough to let them in. You will have to decide if that is something you are willing to pursue."

"I see," That would take a lot of thought on her part. If it was something she could do then she should make use of it rather than waste it. To train it though sounded like it would be rather unpleasant. For a moment she remained silent before looking up at him, "Would you be the one to train me if I did it on the ship?" Kiri trusted him more than most but not really enough to start poking at her mind. Given what had just happened she didn't like the idea he seemed to be forming about her parents or life.

"That would be up to you," Liyar said truthfully. "There are other telepaths aboard, including Lieutenant Mialin who is in a unique position to instruct you, Joined as she is. Were you to undergo training, I would encourage you to select an instructor who is both competent and trustworthy."

"Okay," Kiri considered that for a few more seconds before asking, "Would you be willing to do so though, if I asked you?" She still didn't know Dea that well so trying her with her secrets might take a while. Plus it seemed that Liyar was an expert, would Dea be?

Liyar nodded. "I would be, yes. I can also provide you with a list of other candidates to approach, should you decide against that. I suggest that you take some time and think over all of the possibilities, read the test results in full, and figure out what you would like this to mean for you. Your abilities will not go anywhere in the meantime."

"Thank you," Kiri took that as a sign she should be going, her legs hadn't quite woken up yet though. Wobbling slightly she managed a small smile, "I will try to arrange a meeting soon, if that is okay?" Before anything else she needed to lay down for a little while, her body telling her it wanted chocolate.

"Affirmative." Liyar sat down and brought up some more calculations, looking up at Kiri again. "I also suggest that you get some rest. If you have any further questions in the future, I shall do my best to answer them."

"Thank you," Nodded her head and started to leave, pins and needles jumping up her feet as she did so making her walk rather lumbering. She had experienced something brand new and had the prospect of more of it to come. To be able to stand inside her own mind, it made her brain hurt thinking about it.

Liyar went back to work after she left, standing and bringing up the same endless rows of numbers he'd been looking at before she arrived.

OFF:

Lieutenant (JG) Kiri Cho
Assistant Chief Science Officer
USS Galileo

Lieutenant (JG) Liyar
Diplomatic Officer, VDF/SDD
USS Galileo

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