Seven Years

Posted on 02 Oct 2017 @ 2:31am by Edward Bauer

503 words; about a 3 minute read

Seven years feel like yesterday.....

Every night I go to sleep, I still hear your screams, calling out for me. Every time I wake up, you're not there. Have you forgiven me for running away? Am I supposed to move on? Am I supposed to forget?

God damn it Lindsay what are your orders? What was I supposed to do? I hear your voice but I can't make out what you're trying to say. The building, the fire, the dominion, Corporal Shore keeps yelling in my ear. The damn ringing isn't helping. It's so loud, why can't I get up? All the parts are still there. Why is Shore still yelling, can't he see I'm good? Just a little rattled from the explosion. Why isn't anyone paying attention to you? Jesus someone get down there! Hunter needs us!

Wait, I can hear Shore now. We've gotta move he says. No damn it, we've gotta save you. Get the ropes, I'm good I'll get her out. Dominion forces converging on our position, thirty seconds, forty men. That's not enough time. If we try to rescue you we all end up dead, but you're the Cap, we can't just leave you behind. I gotta think of something and I gotta do it fast. Shore's trying to pull me away, but I keep shoving him off. I just need a little more time to think. Twenty seconds, hurry up Ed you're running out of time. I can feel my heart beating against my body armor, it's gonna crack if it pushes any harder. The ringing's getting quieter, Shore sure as hell isn't. I look around to the boys, all of them staring at me nervously anxiously awaiting my orders. They wanna go home, I can see it in their eyes, but they ain't cowards either. They depend on me, Hunter is depending on me to take care of them. To make sure they see their wives and children again. Make up for missed birthdays, date nights at that little pasta place they like, drinks under the moonlight.

I need to make a decision. That's a lie, I just made it.

They pinned a bunch of medals on my chest. Told me I was a hero and I should be proud. Hell they even promoted me. They didn't have anything to pin on your chest. All they had for you was an empty box and a flag. I couldn't even look Paul and Rachel in the eye. I'm surprised your dad didn't come up and deck me in the face. Izzy gave a hell of a eulogy, you would've loved it even though you hated when people talked you up. I made myself pretty scarce after the ceremony. Shore and Alvarez hung around, said some people were looking for me. A crock if you ask me.

Everyday has been the same for me after that. Your screams, your absence, the stupid medals and that empty box.

Here I am, seven years later still waiting for your orders.

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