The Disservice of Favors
Posted on 22 Jan 2014 @ 9:47pm by Lieutenant Olsam Mott & Lieutenant Teth Miir
2,221 words; about a 11 minute read
Mission:
Episode 05 - Solstice
Location: Starfleet Headquarters
Timeline: MD 14, 0100
[ ON ]
Olsam rushed into the room and immediately slammed his hand against the doorpad, sealing the door behind him and leaning against it breathlessly. In his arms he was cradling a science uniform and a medkit; his shifty-eyed appearance made him look like someone was following him.
"Quick, get up!" he said. He tossed the uniform at Teth and then without waiting for a reply, Olsam crossed the room to the side of the recovery bed and began deactivating the biometric sensors. "C'mon, I need your help, it's an emergency!"
Teth looked down at the uniform in his lap and then back up at the frantic Bolian who was tapping away at a control panel.
"Olsam?" the caitian said with a yawn, "What time is it? What are you doing?"
"Time? What? I don't know!" Olsam said, exasperated. "C'mon! Get up! I just finished discharging you. We need to hurry up and get there before they do it. You should put that uniform on... It might be a size or so too small. I didn't have time to size it properly, I just grabbed it."
Teth thought about arguing further with the doctor, but decided against it. He did seem legitimately upset. So he managed to pull himself from his bed and began to squeeze his willowy and angular frame into what appeared to be a uniform designed for the body proportions of an Andorian male. The sleeves on the tunic and pants were easily fifteen centimeters too short, though he was somehow still slender enough to at least zip them.
"Ok, I'm dressed. Why are we panicking?"
Olsam whirled on him. "Didn't you hear!? They're replacing all the personal waste extraction units on the ship while it's being refit. They're going to use the Waste Extraction Unit Mark VI. It's new, Teth, but it is not a superior model. It has inferior suction and..." He lowered his voice to a whisper. "...capacity. We have to stop them before it's too late. They can't change the model on my quarters. They just can't! I'll have a sit-in if I have to! I'll do it!"
"This is just about toilets?"
Teth rolled his eyes and started removing his tiny uniform.
"I'm going back to sleep."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Olsam said, looking wild-eyed and desperate. "Just toilets? Just toilets? No. There's no such thing as just toilets for a Bolian. There's either a waste extraction unit that's gonna do the job, or there's not. There's no in between, okay? And if the whole ship is using the Mark VI, what am I gonna do? Go in the airlock?"
Teth cradled his face in is hand and sighed deeply.
"So what do you suggest we do? Take the ship and refuse it's release until the Starfleet corps of engineers agrees to rescind use of the Mark VI units?" he asked with sarcastic boredom.
Olsam seemed to contemplate the idea for a long moment. "I don't think either one of us is certified to fly the ship, so that's not going to work. What if we just talk to the dockmaster? I tried to talk to him earlier but I was just so upset, I don't think he was listening to me and I thought to myself, 'Olsam, who can help you?' And I thought of you. Somebody has to explain it. And nobody ever listens to a Bolian. They think we're just picky about these things. But I'm not even picky. I'm just particular! I have special needs!"
"Alright. So you want me to tell the dockmaster that the new toilets are unacceptable because.... what exactly is so dangerous about Bolian biowaste? Is it going to eat through the deckplating or something?"
"Um, almost. Yes. I mean, maybe if I had a really spicy meal or it sat there long enough..."
"And I guess they didn't take Bolian crewmembers into account when designing them?" he asked rhetorically, pulling his tiny tunic back on.
"I will be happy to help you in any way I can, Olsam. And I appreciate the early discharge, however I would especially appreciate more warning in the future. Do you know where to find the dock-master at this hour?
"Right, more warning, okay, I can do that," Olsam said, sounding out of breath and thinking twenty steps ahead.
He opened the medkit and pulled out a hypospray, then began rummaging through the different vials of medication trying to find the right one. "Okay, new plan. Dock-master MacDougal is at the fleet yards right now. You go in his office and distract him, then I sneak up behind him and bam! Get him with this hypo of melorazine, and we change his work orders."
"You can't be serious." Teth said, feeling exhausted, both from his recent neural surgery and by the doctors bounding and endless energy.
"Perhaps we could just talk to him about it first?"
"Hm. Well. Okay, I guess," Olsam said, sounding only half convinced. He left the hypospray loaded and closed up his medkit, deciding to bring it along 'just in case.' "Let's go talk to him."
=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Approaching the dock-master's office, Olsam seemed to try to stay flattened against the wall. His eyes were constantly darting around from side-to-side, as if to monitor who might be approaching him.
"What're we gonna do if he doesn't listen to us? Do you know any Admirals?"
"I do know admirals." Teth said as he walked toward the office, making absolutely no effort to conceal himself. "But I would be seriously out of line to go directly to one with a request like this."
They finally made it to the office door, it would have been a quicker trip had Olsam not decided to act as a covert operative.
The Bolian seemed unconvinced about their approach; honestly, he couldn't imagine a better line to go in order to take care of the situation than straight to the top. Priority One! Should he have contacted the Federation Councillor from the Bolian World Council to lobby the President on his behalf? He held the plan in reserve should today go poorly.
"Okay," Olsam said, taking so many deep breaths in a row that he was on the verge of hyperventilating. "Brace yourself. This guy is... He's serious. It's like talking to a Zakdorn."
He tapped the door chime on the control pad, waited for the command to enter and then ducked behind his much taller friend when they opened to allow them entry.
Dock-master MacDougal sat behind his desk. Or stood. It was hard to tell. He was a very round looking human with a kind face who appeared to be no taller than 4'11". When he looked up and smiled at Teth, Olsam flinched as if expecting a barrage of phaser fire.
"Good afternoon, lieutenant, how can I help you?" MacDougal inquired, giving a broad smile. Even his voice exuded warmth and kindness. He lifted an eyebrow at the girth of Bolian sticking out from either side behind the thin Caitian but remained silent about it for now.
"Hello, Dock-master MacDougal, I presume?" Teth said with a slight bow to the squat man at the desk, "I am Lt. Miir and am here with my colleague, Dr. Mott. We have some concerns regarding the new waste reclamation systems that the Galileo is being fitted with?"
Called out, Olsam side-stepped Teth and stood stiffly next to him. He kept a watchful, suspicious eye on the dock-master.
"Yes, I believe your colleague was here earlier," MacDougal said, picking up a PADD. "I tried to explain there was nothing I could do-"
Olsam made an exasperated sound, earning a reproachful look from the dock-master.
"-but there's a special requisition form he can file to make an exception for his quarters and work areas. I don't think he really heard that part, though. He just sort of lost it when I said I couldn't help."
The Bolian suddenly looked sheepish.
Teth gave Olsam a sideways glare. For a moment he was filled with an intense anger toward his Bolian friend. He had dragged him out of his bed in a panic, forced him into a ridiculously undersized uniform to gallivant headquarters, all over a toilet issue which could easily be fixed with a simple requisition form. An in that brief moment he wanted nothing more than to grab him by throat and strangle him, watching the life drain from his face. Feeling immensely disturbed by his own fantasy he pushed the thought aside and forced his mind to a more pleasant place. He smiled graciously and smoothed his face and voice back to their default warm and pleasant settings.
"Do you happen to know who we would need to contact to obtain said forms?"
"Uh, well, I have them here," MacDougal said, handing over the PADD he'd been holding. He gave Olsam a look one might cast at an escape mental patient. "I tried to give 'em to that fella earlier but he tore outta here so quick I couldn't get 'em in his hands."
"Oh," Olsam said dumbly. Turning an embarrassed shade of blue, he shrugged at Teth.
"Do you have any idea which quarters you've been assigned to?" Teth asked, handing the PADD to Olsam, "Because obviously you will need to make a request for the lavatories attached to sickbay."
Olsam took the PADD and began filling in some information. "Yeah, I've gotten the assignment but I don't have a roommate yet. Ooo! Do you wanna be my roommate? C'mon! All the junior officers have to have one now. I promise I won't take medical scans of you in the middle of the night or forget to put my dishes in the replicator or anything. Honest!"
Teth gave the request serious consideration. He liked Olsam, truly. He liked him as a person. Even if he did occasionally evoke violent impulses in him. Then again, in recent days it seemed everyone and everything felt like a potential threat. Perhaps living with his doctor wasn't a bad idea, all things considered.
"I would be honored to." the caitian finally agreed, "I will put in the request to the quartermaster immediately."
Olsam beamed. "Perfect! And you're gonna love the Mark V. It's like the warm embrace of a lifelong friend." The Bolian finished up the paperwork on the PADD and surrendered it back to the dock-master with thanks. He motioned to the door, sweeping a hand in front of him to graciously let Teth go ahead of him. "Thanks for coming with me! I guess maybe I should pay a little more attention in future, hm? Sometimes I just get so caught up in the moment."
"I've noticed." Teth said as he walked alongside the doctor, "Have you ever considered therapy?"
"Not even once," Olsam said, standing aside to allow his friend to step through the doorway as the Bolian's substantial frame wouldn't allow dual passage.
When Teth had his back turned, Olsam whirled his head around and looked over his shoulder at Dock-master MacDougal. The Bolian winked so hard and so purposefully that he half looked like he was enduring a stroke. MacDougal acknowledged the gesture with a wave and a grimace at the wink, though Olsam was already disappearing through the door to catch up with his friend.
MacDougal settled back down at his desk and lovingly adjusted a picture frame. In it, the dock-master was standing next to a lovely Bolian bride who was beaming almost as brightly as he was: the picture of wedded bliss. The problem with marrying Bolians, he reflected, was that their families were too big and some relative was always coming around asking for a favor. Case in point, the crazy one who had just slipped out the door, his beloved Rixxa's third cousin twice removed or some convoluted nonsense. Why he'd ever need to deceive someone into thinking they were helping with a waste extraction unit requisition request was beyond him, but he'd stopped asking question 47 Bolian favors ago.
Olsam whistled cheerfully next to his new buddy and roommate, a twinkle in his eye and a spring in his step. "Operation Cure Teth Miir" (not a clever operational name, but he just wasn't very good at naming things) was well under way. Phase One - getting Teth out of the hospital and back to feeling useful - was complete. Granted, they really were replacing the Mark V with the Mark VI, and the Mark V really was a superior model to its predecessor. But he'd been completely capable of filling out the form on his own; the hard part had been convincing MacDougal to agree to drag Teth into the process and then not blow the whole subterfuge himself with bad acting.
Maybe it was overkill. But a clever Bolian - and, oh yes, he was the cleverest of clever Bolians - knew when to take advantage of a situation to incorporate it into an impossibly convoluted plot to improve his friend's mental health.
Now, on to Phase Two....
[OFF]
Lt. JG Olsam Mott M.D.
Assistant Chief of Medicine
USS Galileo
&
Lt. JG Teth Miir
Counselor
USS Galileo
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