Finding Meaning

Posted on 30 Sep 2025 @ 6:48pm by Lieutenant JG Delainey Carlisle

330 words; about a 2 minute read

Hovar remains in stasis, and while the waiting is difficult, I’ve begun to realize that uncertainty doesn’t always have to mean despair. He is still with us, still fighting, and as long as that is true, there is reason to keep faith in his recovery. I continue to visit him, sometimes alone, sometimes joined by others. These visits have become less about mourning what we might lose and more about honoring what we still have. Sitting there, I am reminded that presence itself is meaningful. Even if he cannot hear us, perhaps he can sense that he is not forgotten.

I’ve also been reflecting on the Captain’s decision to send me into that lab for the tissue sample. At the time, it felt like a test of my resolve—and perhaps it was. But I am working to keep an open mind about her choices, trying to better understand her by watching how her decisions shape events and affect those around her. Her style can feel demanding, even harsh at times, but there is purpose in the way she pushes people beyond their comfort zones. I may not always agree with her methods, but I cannot ignore their impact - good or bad.

Fear was present that day in the science lab, yes, but so was courage. And courage carried the day. That lesson has stayed with me—not only for my own growth but for how I guide others through theirs.

Hope is not naive optimism—it is the discipline of believing in possibilities even when outcomes are unclear. That is what I remind myself, and what I remind the crew. Hovar’s story is not finished. None of ours are. Until the moment arrives when we must face whatever comes, our task is simple: to keep showing up for each other, day after day.

If that is endurance, then we are proving ourselves capable of it. In that, I find not despair, but strength.

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